On Sunday, our family (incredibly including my husband) attended the Unitarian Universalist church I wrote about in a previous post. My oldest son wanted to return the money he had collected for a UNICEF service project there. It was Halloween, so the children's story time focused on how many people honor those who have died during this holiday time. They briefly touched on various traditions and invited the children to remember those in their family who had died. I found this a meaningful way to address the holiday, rather than labeling it as evil or reducing it to cute costumes and candy.
My children came home lamenting, and I mean with loud wails(they are dramatic types), both the death of their pet fish, Blue, 2 years ago, and the death of their grandpa, my dad, 4 years ago. They decided to commemorate the passing of Blue by pouring a glass of water over his burial site in the backyard as they had done when we buried him, (so he would have water in which to swim). Then my youngest decided to pour a glass of water on the tree which his grandparents bought for his birthday gift when he turned one. He then made a wish that his grandpa would "come alive again." It was a tearful moment for me, but I was touched that my boys longed for a connection with their grandpa. Today, November 5th, is the fourth anniversary of his passing. Needless to say, he's on my mind today. Every year, we remember him by doing many things my dad loved to do and likely would be doing with my boys now. It's a way for them to experience what they might have had with their grandpa. I picked a book from the library to read to them that my dad read to me. After school we'll get ice cream, which he greatly enjoyed, and watch a recording of him telling a story to my children. Then, we'll play chess at a chess club, where my oldest is developing a passion for a game his grandpa loved as well.
I'll close by including a famous quote by John Wesley, which my dad had written inside the cover of his Bible. It certainly reflects the way he spent his 57 years in this world.
“Do all the good you can,
By all the means you can,
In all the ways you can,
In all the places you can,
At all the times you can,
To all the people you can,
As long as ever you can.”
"They briefly touched on various traditions and invited the children to remember those in their family who had died. I found this a meaningful way to address the holiday, rather than labeling it as evil or reducing it to cute costumes and candy." I'm sure you know already from reading my post, but I completely agree - it does sound like a nice tradition.
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